A Lovely Stop on the Way to My Parents' Home
I am a big fan of exposing my inspirations as a way of letting you know I am not as clever and genius as you may think.
This morning, I am hooked on the song linked at the bottom of this post. OK---so really, it is a romantic song. But art is for the interpreting; it is there to inspire us in whatever way it does. With that said, I am kinda meditating on the idea that Home is Wherever I'm With You and forgetting all the rest of the lovey-dovey lyrics. Fuck love. It always bites, anyway...nasty snake that it is.
In my essay, Consider the Name Ralph, I mention one of the most beautiful things about my life: deconstruction and reconstruction of family. When I was in WV last weekend, my family had a lovely Shabbos meal. And there were only two Jews at our table of about 15 people. What a gorgeous experience!!! After dinner, my family insisted I read Ralph and Memory (both below).
Look---we are an exceptional family. Our matriarch died about 6 years ago. Then Dad died. Then Nana died. Then we all became survivors of homicide. And we are flailing. We are thrashing about. We are sad and trying to come together. And we have been completely lost for a while....we haven't been able to identify the center of our family.
And then we realized the incredible tragedies of this year brought us together.
My humble, lovely, intelligent cousin Megan sat on the couch after dinner while I read. She cried. Several people cried. I like doing that to people.
And then Megan reflected on our family and our journeys. She feels we are stronger now than we have ever been before. I couldn't agree more.
Now, being a family isn't as easy and intuitive as it was before.
Now, our family includes people who are not bound by blood.
Actually, my personal picture of family has only included traces of blood for a while, but it has taken me the test of this year to see my theory of family materialize.
Home is Wherever I'm With You. Family is Wherever I'm With You. You=ambiguous family, wherever they are. Atlanta, West Virginia, Israel. If I were to recreate that Shabbos meal with every member of my "immediate family", you would be there. There would be over 100 people there.
And my Mother's living room would magically expand, which is what it does every time someone dies and we do our super unique, not-really-Jewish shiva thing. And it would expand because that is what happens with space on Shabbos anyway.
And my Mother's living room would magically expand, which is what it does every time someone dies and we do our super unique, not-really-Jewish shiva thing. And it would expand because that is what happens with space on Shabbos anyway.
You are a member of my family.
My Current Mission
Keep writing. Keep painting. Keep knitting.
But really keep writing.
Figure out how to make writing and spoken word collide.
Start whoring myself to publishers.
Get published.
Sit on that money and don't work. Get really rich. And then purchase homes in Atlanta and Jerusalem. Ta-Da!
I can do it. I promise I can.
